Things are looking very bad right now, but I’m not giving up. I can’t give up because of the dogs. If it weren’t for them, truthfully, I don’t know. I’ve had a tough life and I don’t see it getting any easier. And I’m tired of fighting. So damn tired.
To be honest, when I got so sick last month that I thought I might die, once I got over being scared, it was almost a relief. Not because I want to die. I don’t. But because dying would put an end to all the pain and misery and worry and stress and fear and the constant struggle just to survive another month.
Obviously I’m still here, but that doesn’t mean I’m all better. I try to ignore the pain as best I can. I can’t afford to be sick and I certainly can’t afford time off to take care of myself.
While I have no freelance work at this time, I have been able to find a job. Not a good job, mind you. No, it’s another contract job. No benefits. Part-time. I’ll be lucky to pick up twenty hours a week and I’ll make less than $10 per hour. Before taxes. Speaking of which, we were able to get an extension on filing our tax returns. We don’t have a penny to spare right now, let alone the hundreds of dollars we owe the IRS in self-employment tax.
Read the rest of this entry »
A huge, giant, colossal THANK YOU to everyone who donated in the past week! You guys are truly lifesavers! Many thanks also to everyone who helped get the word out on Twitter and Facebook and especially to the awesome bloggers who asked their readers to lend us a helping hand.
As a result of your help, we will be able to pay our rent and utilities in February! I have also been able to buy more of my meds, which is a good thing because I’ve been battling severe depression (probably not entirely the result of my messed up brain chemistry). And, very importantly, we’ll be able to take care of our beloved Balou.
We’re treating him with nutrition, herbs, and other supplements rather than “conventional” cancer therapy. Even if we could afford surgery and chemo, which we can’t, I’d have difficulty subjecting him to painful, debilitating treatments at his age. We can’t be sure exactly how old our wonderful boy is given that he was a fully-grown adult when we adopted him, but he has to be at least 13 and could be 14 or 15. In other words, he’s already quite old for a dog of his size and breed. Our goal is to keep him happy and comfortable as long as we can. He was fading badly in December but has regained some of his strength thanks to the treatment your donations help make possible.
We now have almost a month to get back on our feet financially, and I’ll be spending every waking moment not occupied with the canine pack trying to do just that. Which unfortunately means this blog will likely be neglected a while longer. I will, however, keep you all posted on our situation. We’re currently still without work, but hopefully that will change soon!
This is the hardest thing I’ve ever written. And if I saw any other way out, there’s no way I’d be sitting here and writing this. Asking for help has always been very difficult for me, and if it was just about me, I probably wouldn’t be doing this. However, I have my dogs to think about. They depend on me and I’m trying real hard not to let them down. So here goes…
After barely making ends meet for a number of years, my partner and I are now in a position where we are facing homelessness. We usually manage to eke out a living selling our skills as freelancers, but during the last few months, work has completely evaporated. We spend all our time searching for jobs, but nothing has panned out.
We have also looked for work outside our field, but since we’re stuck in the boonies without a car, our employment opportunities are severely limited. Nonetheless, in an effort to leave no stone unturned, my partner did put in applications for two local just-above-minimum-wage jobs. Given that he has no experience in these lines of work and competition for any kind of job is beyond fierce around here, this is a long shot. Moreover, even if they do hire him, he wouldn’t get paid enough money fast enough to avoid eviction.
Read the rest of this entry »
I was going to say what I’m about to say in a comment at Corrente, but my login there isn’t working. Rather than spend another thirty minutes trying to figure out why their site says I’m logged in when I look at the homepage but logged out when I click on the post in question to comment, I thought I’d write a quick post on the matter on my own blog. Besides, Lambert is hardly the only lefty guilty of this offense.
The offense I’m referring to is calling poor people “weak” (as in, “the GOP wants to slash welfare programs because they don’t care about the weak,” or “both legacy parties want to kill the weak so 20% DISemployment suits them just fine”) or some variation thereof. Liberal KGO radio host Bernie Ward would always emphasize the importance of donating money to help “the least of us.” By that he meant the very poor, particularly the homeless, and especially individuals with mental health and/or substance abuse problems. I know he meant well and yes, I also know the phrase is from the bible. And yet it always rubbed me the wrong way to hear this extremely privileged man with his six-figure income refer to poor people in this manner. If the poor and homeless are “the least of us,” what does that make the wealthy?
Calling poor people “weak” is particularly problematic. I’d like to see some of those rich trust fund kids survive even 10% of the crap life has thrown my way. “The Poor” lack a lot of things: Opportunity. Justice. Health care. Affordable housing. One thing most of us don’t lack is strength. Or resilience. Or resourcefulness. We more or less have to have those qualities or we don’t survive. So to hear people call us “weak” because the odds are stacked against us, while those handed every advantage get to flatter themselves that they’re “strong” is pretty much the ultimate insult.